Our adopted daughter experienced a completely overwhelming time at secondary school and MFSM were a trusted light in the awful darkness. She really struggled with her mental health and it turns out is autistic – this process of discovery and battling our way through some very difficult times was supported to a huge extent by our daughter’s mentor from MFSM. She was always so sane and wise and kept us believing in positive outcomes when we really felt in despair. Really can not recommend MFSM enough to anyone with teens who are struggling on any level.
I started seeing Claire in Y9 at a time when I hated school and life and struggled to go in. She helped me realise that even though I thought my problems were REALLY big and scary, that actually they will pass and blow over and maybe not that bad in the end. She really helped me understand how my brain works and why I might react in different situations and how to cope. I trust her to help me, she gets me.
My future self has helped me to seek advice and have someone to talk to when issues have come up but also form a relationship with someone who genuinely cares how you are doing and cares about you in general. My future self has also allowed me to set my goals straight for my future and has helped me to understand how I will get there. Personally, I have found healthier ways of coping with stress through my future self which has been taught to me over the period of time I had with Carl. My future self has also taught me that my future does matter and the foundations that I lay now will impact positively onto my future goals and help me achieve them. One of the main aspects which I have really taken in is how to chose healthy habits in contrast to not as healthy ones. My future self helped me to get where I am today, content and excited about my future and what it may hold after not having a lot of passion for it. My future self helped me get through a lot by me having that person who listened and genuinely cared about me which is sometimes all that someone needs. It is something I definitely recommend.
Mia started to see Claire in a point of deep crisis. As parents, we were both worried, scared and concerned about behaviours that we had never seen from our little girl before and felt helpless as to how to assist her. We could see she was hurting deeply and really struggling mentally. Self harm was also evident, something that neither of us had any experience of. Claire’s warm, unpressured and trust-building approach to Mia worked very quickly to give them a space, where their connection was strong enough and trusting enough for Mia to start sharing with Claire, which she did openly and without barriers, a true testament.
We started to unravel and understand some of the thought processes that were causing her to display the behaviours which had worried us so much. Claire has helped Mia to learn more about herself: the way she reacts in certain situations, and why, and also over the course of time given her a tool kit, which she can dip into to use when she is trying to deal with difficult circumstances on her own, without a supportive adult around her. More than that, Claire has been a huge support to us as parents, not only acting as a liaison to help us understand the struggles that Mia faced, but also to give us tips and techniques to support our little girl to work on and improve our relationship with her.
Seeing your child in crisis and feeling helpless is one of the most painful things I have had to experience as a parent and I will be forever grateful to Claire for what she has done, not only for my daughter, but for me as a parent. We have seen huge growth and maturity in Mia as a result of the work she has done with Claire.
Nothing is ever perfect and we have to revisit techniques and tools frequently , but now we feel more confident, better equipped and more understanding of the struggles that our daughter faces. With Claire’s assistance, we have been able to get a neurodiverse diagnosis for Mia, which I had long suspected and she has so desperately needed to be able to justify to herself, the behaviours and the emotions, she experiences on a day-to-day basis.
Claire. I think you are an incredible practitioner with a unique approach to young ladies, empowering them to be who they deserve to be, but also the most incredible human being. I personally would not have survived the last year without knowing that you were by our sides.
My experience of working with Carl at MFSM over the years has been overwhelmingly positive. Carl has worked with a number of my young people who have needed different levels of support and intervention over time. My young people have benefitted from Carl’s understanding about the thoughts and feelings my young people are experiencing. He has been able to motivate them to explore these, but always with a goal in mind to work towards. In that way the young people have a sense of achievement, in the short-term small steps, and then in the long term when they reflect on their journey towards their main goal. I have also experienced this with Claire, another member of the team, who has been instrumental in supporting a young person returning to school positively.
Carl has always been honest when he felt that mentoring was not having a positive impact for reasons such as the young person is not ready or there are other interventions that need to come first, which gives me the confidence that MFSM is child centred and for the benefit of the young person. Carl and Claire have always been willing to discuss my young people whenever I call and will even attend meetings when needed for the benefit of the young person. I can’t recommend MFSM enough if you need to support a young person needing some help with direction or heading towards a crisis point. They understand our young people and the difficulties that they face, as well as having a wealth of experience and local connections to support our young people to achieve their goals.
Working with Carl has given my son some strategies and tools to use to regulate his emotions and manage his anxiety. He enjoyed spending time with Carl and has benefitted from having someone outside the family who spent time listening and supporting him.
It was not only the content of what Carl covered with my son which was helpful. But also the way Carl modelled the behaviours himself in terms of the way he ran the sessions – eg listening to my son’s wishes, being flexible and accommodating, being really calm and positive.
As a parent, I have also benefitted from having someone else who I felt was supporting my son and me, and could act as a sounding board for my concerns and questions, based on Carl’s experience of working with other young people.
My son uses a number of techniques that Carl covered with him – eg box breathing and taking restorative time out. He also talks about the link between thoughts, emotions and behaviour, and the usefulness of recognizing and exploring his thoughts.
I just wanted you to know that the sessions you have conducted with Barney have made a big difference to him and consequently me and our family life.
I have observed this first hand in the choices he is making and how he is responding to situations. He also talks more openly to me.
You have supported him through a tricky transition as me and his dad have gone our separate ways. I know the highlight of his week has often been his sessions with yourself.
Gosh, where do I start? MFSM have been absolutely invaluable. The direct effects from MFSM working with our son have been felt across our family. We have our son back! In short, he had become a shadow of himself. Working with MFSM brought him back to us and gave him the confidence and ability to grow in so many ways. He’s always been a well-rounded, intelligent, kind and thoughtful person. We knew this, but he too needed to believe this and in himself. MFSM has coached him through some big life changes and without a doubt eased the process immeasurably, giving him the skills and tools not just to cope, but to thrive. I will be forever grateful to MFSM!
On reflection, we spend much more time laughing as a family – something we’ve really missed. Our son’s ability to have a laugh and a joke now (especially light-hearted banter directed at him) without it escalating to a serious and often dark place is just wonderful. To hear and feel his happiness on a day-to-day basis is a blessing. His relationship with his younger brother is just wonderful, and has definitely improved through working with MFSM. We’ve always had open channels of communication, but these have definitely strengthened and deepened since working with MFSM.
Carl has worked with a number of our students at The Grange. One particular student had not been at school for two years and over time working with Carl he was able to get the student back into school and over a half term was able to be back full time. This student is able now to attend all lessons and is preparing for his mock exams.
Carl has made a big difference to this young person and a number of others in our setting and we have been really impressed with his work, his communication and flexibility. Students report that he is approachable and he supports the children in ways that other agencies are unable to – such as playing sport with them as a way to get them to talk.
Claire was assigned as my son’s mentor after he hadn’t attended school in many months due to mental health issues caused by sustained bullying. He was reluctant to engage initially as he lacked trust in professionals due to feeling let down but Claire took the time to foster a rapport with him which led, in turn, to him sharing his thoughts with her. This was such a huge break through. Claire also liaised with the school’s SENDCO on a regular basis and provided a clear picture to the school of my son’s needs. As a result, my son has now secured a place at an additional provision setting which specialises in supporting young people whose mental health needs are preventing them from accessing their existing school.
My son’s mentor is first class and an excellent role model. They set clear standards and my son respected them as an individual and as a professional. Their work was very much appreciated
My Future Self Matters have been nothing short of brilliant at building relationships with young people I have worked with, gaining their trust and developing their interests, self-esteem and managing the complex issues many of them face in their lives. I would absolutely be recommending My Future Self Matters for all young people regardless of their circumstances.
Senior Social Worker – Buckinghamshire Council
My Future Self Matters attended a very difficult restorative meeting with a young person, it is a very complex case with the young person exhibiting high levels of animosity towards staff. The young person’s mentor was invaluable in terms of engaging with this young person and using their positive relationship as the basis to try and encourage him to reintegrate and engage in the restorative process. I am really impressed by the calm authority that the mentor displays with young people and the way in which they are able to effectively manage the boundaries associated with the role.
My Future Self Matters are knowledgeable and attentive when it comes to working and building rapport with young people. They hold many years’ experience of working with some of our most vulnerable, challenging and in need young people. My Future Self Matters manage to achieve positive outcomes including the improvement of well-being and mental health of young people that are struggling with day-to-day life. They receive positive feedback from young people and colleagues alike
Nobody else quite helped me like My Future Self Matters did. Their approach towards helping young people is one of a kind and seriously affective! Many previous workers, therapists and counsellors couldn’t reach through to me on the level my mentor at My Future Self Matters did. I’m not lying when I say they have played a big part in helping me change my life and lifestyle around, even when I felt hopeless, having a session or even just a chat would give me the right amount of hope I needed to carry on trying and never give up.
We reached out to My Future Self Matters when our son was struggling in all areas of his life. The main issues at the time were school related, as he hates school life and everything that goes with it! He was emotionally very down, very angry and generally unhappy. My Future Self Matters have now been working with him for a few months and there has been a considerable change in his mood and general outlook on life! His mentor is wonderful with teens as well as supporting us as a family. They have the ability to connect with our son on his level, and my son says that he fees extremely comfortable and relaxed talking to his mentor. He has been given coping strategies to use and these are really helping. His mentor is professional, approachable, patient and empathetic and just “gets” him! I would highly recommend My Future Self Matters if your child is in need of some support and help. The difference in a few months has been amazing! Thank you to My Future Self Matters !
I am honestly glad I contacted My Future Self Matters when I did. My mentor didn’t only just speak to me as a professional, but they were also so dedicated that it made it easy for a friendship to come along throughout our time spent on sessions. My mentor made me build up the confidence I never thought I would have, making it easier for me to see how much I can actually achieve in life. My mentor brought me up every time I was down and never brought any doubts upon me, always had a positive attitude towards everything, making me believe I am worth it and that I could do a lot more than I think I could. When I first got in contact with My Future Self Matters, I was at a low point in my life and mental health wasn’t doing well either, my mentor put so much effort and care into my situation that they got me to open up, which is hard for someone so anxious. My mentor is a very very caring, dedicated, non-judgemental and open person that you could easily feel comfortable to talk to. I could easily say that my mentor has been a massive part of my character development and improvement in general. I really don’t know the person I would be right now if I didn’t make contact with My Future Self Matters when I did. The time I’ve spent talking to my mentor, I will always be grateful for as like I’ve mentioned previously, it hasn’t just been a professional to teenager relationship but it’s also become a friendship along the way too. Honestly couldn’t recommend anyone else more than My Future Self Matters!
I appreciate everything you have done for me, I wouldn’t have been able to do it without your help
My son seems to be doing really well at the moment and is happy, healthy and safe. I’m incredibly indebted to you for your work with him and I think I contacted the service at just the right time. He is helping around the house and I think he appreciates the bond we have. He has had a turbulent time with his dad lately and he was upset by that but seems to be making his own choices in regards to the relationship he has with his father. Thank you for all of the hard work you have put in with regards to my son, he speaks highly of you and he has enjoyed your time together
I’ve been working with My Future Self Matters for a couple of years now and my mentor has honestly been the only professional that has genuinely helped me. My mentor is really easy to talk to and I can speak to them without the fear of judgement. My mentor is also just a nice genuine person with great intentions and gives good advice. If you are struggling, I would 100% recommend
It was great to meet you at last. My son has been doing so much better and I’ll always be very thankful for the support you gave especially when he was struggling so much. Thanks for your continued support and hope My Future Self Matters goes from strength to strength and helps many
My Future Self Matters has been instrumental in supporting our son on a 1:1 basis. His mentor was patient, calm, kind and focused in his work. Our son is a young person who initially presents as closed, hesitant and uncertain, largely contributable to his ASD diagnosis. However, our son engaged beautifully with his mentor. Due to his mentor’s persistence, he was able to build a really positive working relationship with him, where they achieved brilliant direct work, and he has now demonstrated an improved understanding of his worries, what to do with them, building a positive working safety plan. My Future Self Matters have been flexible in their approach, amending their direct work to the needs of our son, extending sessions and having constant good communication with us. The hard work that My Future Self Matters has put into our family has had clear positive outcomes for our son. It was a real pleasure to see how well our son developed in his emotional regulation and worry management, and feeling the huge improvements in his relationship with us
My Future Self Matters was very professional, well organised, punctual and reliable. Our daughters mentor set clear action plans, clear boundaries and clear expectations that were conveyed to my daughter. I think it is largely through My Future Self Matters work that my daughter has come through her struggles, her mentor was really ‘there for her’. The qualities I have listed are rare experiences for a parent where their child is experiencing a rebellious youth. My daughters mentor was intelligent, realistic and objective. In the darkest hours, I felt like they understood and was there for my daughter
Thank you for the support you have given us. You’ve made a big difference and it’s much appreciated
My Future Self Matters made quite the impression on us, they are obviously very passionate about what they do and their level of professionalism and sensitivity in dealing with our daughter’s needs is a credit to them. We feel fortunate to have met such a dedicated service who are prepared to ‘go that extra mile’ and I would like to thank them for their huge efforts
My husband and I thank you very much. Our daughter is different when you talk to her, she gives us more attention, she wants to spend more quality time together and most of all her happiness has come back to her. I know that we are guilty, the family problems we have experienced and the time spent away working, we did not pay the necessary attention to our daughter and she sought attention elsewhere. We are both very grateful and hope you can do further work with her.
Thank you for helping me out and being there to listen to me, I really appreciate it. I will definitely try and be more positive person from now on and I will try remember everything you have taught me
Thank you for all your help and support since we have known each other, you have made a big difference to my outlook on life
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